Friday, December 12, 2008
Self-Defeating or Evolving?
What's the difference between being self-defeating or evolving as a person? As a young person, when you pick a certain path, whether it be the high, low or middle path, you're usually respected on some level if you stick with whatever you choose. If you don't stick with the plan, then people say, "I don't know about that guy/woman."
As a young man or late teenager, depending which way you look at it, I decided to go to college rather than pursue a trade and take over the family business my grandfather and uncle own. I did this for many reasons that aren't necessarily relevant anymore. Either way, I chose to do something and I made it through college. Suddenly, I needed to choose again.
What are my options, exactly? Marriage, kids, house and a 9 to 5? Ha! That's the anti-choice as far as I'm concerned. Things are a bit more complicated in my mind. I could choose to go at my career full bore and hold a few jobs to get my rep. up, which is why I'm already doing. I'm not sure how well I'm doing, but I know I'm working hard, either way.
Also, there's the location question; where do I want to be now and in five years? I've talked a bit about buying a home because it will stabilize my financial situation and give me a sense of place, rather than a frenetic transient lifestyle that I've been used to for my entire adult life.
I'm quite close to settling in one place for a while. It'll probably be Worcester where my family lives and where the cost of living is lower. I'm also close to launching my small biz which will hopefully allow me to be independently employed under my own terms in coming years. I also think I'll be in grad school in September if the schools I'm applying to are not stingy.
All this being said, I feel like it wouldn't take a lot of convincing and a little bit of opportunity to pull up all my roots and take the hell off to wherever the action and interest is in the world. If I got a call from a solar installer or manufacturer in Colorado and asked me to get out there by New Years and get to work, I'd be gone so quick you wouldn't even know what had just happened.
Although, that situation probably won't occur at this point in my career, who knows? More importantly, what does it mean that I want this to occur? Are my constantly evolving ideas and goals a good thing or are they keeping me from achieving anything truly meaningful and measurable in life?
I suppose these are the questions that need to be asked before the year ends. I ask for and appreciate any and all input.
Are you facing and significant urges to change your life around beyond recognition?